Stop being underpaid: The 4 steps that changed everything

I spent years being underpaid. Not because I wasn't good enough. Not because I didn't deserve more.

Because I didn't ask.

(That's not easy to admit.)

Here's the truth I wish someone had told me: No one is coming to save you.

Your boss isn't secretly planning to surprise you with a massive raise because you're so awesome. That's not how this works.

You have to ask for what you're worth.

And I'm going to show you exactly how I finally got the courage to do it... and walked away with 30% more money.

#1: Do your research (But don't just Google it…)

The first time I tried to negotiate, I walked in with printouts from Glassdoor.

My manager gave me a look that said it all.

"Those numbers don't apply to our company structure," he said.

I felt so embarrassed.

I left with nothing except a lesson learnt the hard way.

Don't be me. Be smarter than me.

Yes, check the salary sites. But that's just step one.

Talk to recruiters who actually know what's happening right now in your industry. They have the real numbers.

Reach out to people at other companies. You'd be surprised how willing people are to share general ranges when you ask them casually.

And remember to document your wins. Revenue you brought in. Money you saved. Problems you fixed. Clients who love you.

Put it on one page. Make it easy for your boss to take it upstairs and say "This is why."

I learnt this through trial and error... mostly error at first.

#2: Curiosity before demands. Always.

Want to know a fast way to get nowhere? Start with "I need a raise."

I tried that approach once. It didn't go well.

The conversation stopped before it really started.

What works much better? Questions.

"I'm curious... what factors determine compensation decisions this year?"

"How does the company think about rewarding someone who's created a new product line like I have?"

These aren't just more pleasant. They're strategic.

Because now you're not demanding... you're problem-solving together.

It's the difference between being a taker and being a partner.

And partners get paid more.

#3: Frame your ask like a pro

This took me time to learn...

How you ask matters just as much as what you're asking for.

My winning formula?

Connect your request to:

1. Market data (so it's not just your opinion)
2. Your specific achievements (so it's not just about the market)
3. Options (this makes all the difference)

Here's what finally worked for me:

"Given the £68–82k market range, and considering I brought in £500k in new business this year through the new product line, I'm suggesting we move my base to £80k, or create an equivalent mix of base and equity. How does that approach sound to you?"

See what happened there? I gave options. I ended with a question.

I made it easier to say yes.

Or take a page from Sheryl Sandberg's playbook.

When negotiating her COO role at Facebook, she told Mark Zuckerberg: "Of course you realise that you're hiring me to run your deal teams, so you want me to be a good negotiator. This is the only time you and I will ever be on opposite sides of the table."

This brilliant framing reminded him that her negotiation skills were exactly why he wanted to hire her!

#4: "No" isn't the end. It's the beginning.

The common mistake? Hearing "no" and giving up.

I've done it. More than once.

Then I finally realised... "No" just means "not yet" or "not this way."

When my boss told me there wasn't budget for a raise, I didn't walk away. I asked:

"I understand. What would need to happen for this to be possible in the future?"

Six months later? I not only got the raise I asked for... I got more.

Because I didn't treat "no" like a door closing. I treated it like an invitation to find another path.

Negotiating can be uncomfortable. I still get nervous sometimes.

But you know what's worse? Looking back years from now and realising you left thousands of dollars on the table because you were afraid to have a conversation.

So here's what you're going to do:

1. Make your one-page achievement sheet today. Not tomorrow. Today.
2. Schedule the conversation this week.
3. Practice what you'll say until it feels natural.
4. Try standing tall with your shoulders back for a minute before you go in. (It really does help with confidence.)

We tend to undervalue ourselves. I know I did.

I spent years thinking I should be grateful just to have a job. That asking for more wasn't right.

What a missed opportunity.

You deserve to be paid what you're worth.

And now you know how to make it happen.